A New Season
As of 12.30pm yesterday I officially finished my job as an Office Administrator and became a stay at home / work from home Mummy. This is a really big decision for me and one that I am equally excited and terrified about.
Excited because of the freedom it will give me to be with Meg and Eli in general but also to have some precious one to one time with Eli now that Meg is at school (which has already seen his language skills come on in leaps and bounds) and because it will be the first time since I was 17 that I haven’t worked (maternity leave not included) – I’ve never had the liberty before.
Terrified because although I feel it is the right decision, and one that is in line with what I believe God is calling me to do, I have to now stand on my own two feet. If I don’t score any work, I won’t bring in any money and that will have an impact on us as a family. If I have a sick day and don’t do any work, that will have an impact on us. I need to readjust and realign my days to make them work better for me and for the kids and it’s all a bit up in the air.
I have lots of thoughts going through my head like:
‘what if it doesn’t work?’
‘what if I’m no good at it?’
‘what if I put all this effort in to try and give myself the foundations for what I really want to be doing and it all goes belly up?’
I don’t know how much of it will be a success or not and I’m trying to be confident that at least I’m giving it a go.
It’s just a bit scary, you know?
With my Other Half finally settled in his new job, and Meg accepting that school isn’t just a one day deal, we are moving things up a notch in this new season and I honestly can’t wait to see the differences. I know good things are going to come from these decisions, and I also know that it probably isn’t going to be a walk in the park. With that in mind, if anyone knows of support groups for work at home mums I would be very interested, I think I need to glean as much useful information and helpful tips as I can from more experienced mummies!