And so we come to the closing of another year. I find it hard to believe that a whole 365 days have passed by, and yet it is so.
Usually at the start of a year I like to sit down and write out some resolutions for myself; things I want to achieve in the coming months, both significant and small. They generally follow the line of travelling more, learning an instrument, finishing jobs in the house, breaking the internet with my success…yada, yada, yada.
The downside to this is that I very rarely achieve all, if any, of these lofty resolutions and so I leave the year feeling like I haven’t been enough. My mind will whir with ‘if only’s’ – if only I had worked harder, been better, done more. If only I had the secret formula to understanding the Instagram/Youtube/insert any old social media platform algorithm. If only I had more time…and yet the simple truth is that we live our lives at 100 miles an hour and achieving a whole string of resolutions is just never going to be feasible. At least not in this stage of our lives.
It gains me nothing to end each year feeling like I have failed, because in reality the truth if very different. I tend to make a highlights video each year and as I sat down to upload our 2018 video, I realised that we have crammed a whole lot into the last 12 months. Sure, playing the flute may still be outside of my abilities but that doesn’t mean that this year hasn’t been a good one. Far from it.
So after a few tears and some deep contemplation; after going back and forth with James and myself about what it was that I really wanted to gain from 2019, I have decided to set myself a word. This word encapsulates all I hope to gain from the year, it is a declaration over the coming months that will hopefully hold me accountable, as well as help to shape my actions and my goals without cornering me too much.
My word for 2019 is…BE
I want to…